Porcine Oracle
The Porcine Oracle delivers a new and thought–provoking prognostication every day. These are delivered to the Porkopolis home page via java scripts.
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Listed below are the Oracle’s Top 10 prognostications for Summer 2007 — a small consolation for you not being able to view the daily presentations.
Porcine Oracle's Top 10 for Summer 2007:
- Happiness is an imaginary condition, formerly often attributed by the living to the dead, now usually attributed to a pig wallowing in manure.
- The fattening pig will be eaten many times in anticipation before it at length falls victim to the butcher’s knife.
- No pig, on noticing that a rose smells better than a cabbage, would conclude that it would also make better soup.
- The black pig in the road at twilight is not an omen. Destiny does not send us heralds. She is too wise or too cruel for that.
- The gourmet tastes the secret dreams of pigs lightly swathed in apricot demi-glaze.
- If you pull one pig by the tail all the rest will also squeak.
- Rituals will always mean throwing away something — the ill–considered waste of good wine or swine upon the altar of some god.
- The fate of pigs is that both the farmer and the butcher think they will soon die.
- Faith alone is no good keeper of swine.
- Some will try to cure ham. This is hopeless. The pig is dead. If you want the ham to get well, leave it attached to the pig.